Hey great news, Public Works has hired three new people! That makes, what? 16 employees? Cool, cool. So, who’s going to make the bathroom keys? Is Brian Hurley going to go do it? You think Derek Bitter is going to drive over to the hardware store? Nope. It’ll be me. I’ll make three keys, just like I do every time there’s a new hire. Unbelievable. I’ll give one key to Lindsey Sires, Digital and Social Media Manager. There you go, have fun with Facebook or whatever you do. Another key to Paige Gregory, Creative Designer. Hope it works. Maybe you can design me a way to get keys without having to see Jeff at the hardware store. That guy rubs me the wrong way. The third key (which I paid for with MY OWN MONEY and WILL PROBABLY NOT BE REIMBURSED FOR) goes to Chelsea Culver, Project Manager. I hear she used to be at Colle McVoy. I bet they have a whole frickin’ key department over there, with assistants and resources. Great. DO NOT LOSE THOSE KEYS. If you do, don’t ask me to replace them. I hate that dang hardware store so much. And don’t even get me started on the key fobs.